PSA

here's the thing; you've been called for jury duty, a very important civic responsibility. you've had to take off work, you'll have to sit around a bunch and wait and wait and wait. you may be questioned endlessly for multiple potential cases, criminal or civil, or both. it will be mostly boring, guaranteed. you may be sent back downstairs to the jury pool over and over. in the end, you may go home on thursday and feel like it was all for nothing.

you are experiencing a relatively minor inconvenience compared to the individuals involved in the cases you are called upon to judge (some of whom have waited for a year or more for their day in court). pull your head out of your ass, step up to the plate, and quit wasting hours of the court's (and everyone else's) time with your pathetically obvious attempts to weasel out of it with stupid excuses and/ or whining. i will stab you and then (if you survive) you're going to have to sit through my trial anyway, and i promise you'll wish you had just done the right thing in the first place.